This must be a familiar scene for many, “my boss is super demanding”, “my wife has endless demands”, “that’s a unreasonable demand on me”, “this kid is so demanding”, the list goes on and on. One day, while in an intense conversation in with someone during a coaching session, it inspired an interesting revelation on the concept of “Demand”. This powerful revelation unleashed many in this downward cycle of demand and reverse the cycle releasing energy, enthusiasm, and exciting pursuit to fulfill demands all around us!
Let me give you snippets of this revelation unpacked here for you:-
Demand is a key ingredient in a healthy relationship
Let’s use a little example: say you have a very special baby, one that doesn’t cry, doesn’t fuss, doesn’t require diaper change and never cries for milk all night long. Very soon, the baby will be left to a corner, no demand, hence no interactions and so on…
If a relationship has no demand, the relationship will die and fizzle out eventually
When there is “Demand”, we will try to “Deliver” and in delivering, there will be “Development” as one deliver and develop, you will find “Delight” in oneself and that in-turn create greater “Desire” to raise the bar activating the powerful virtuous cycle demand all over again but this time, it will be in greater capacity!
Friends, hope this revelation will change your perspective on “Demands” and the way you handle demands placed upon you. Demand is a key ingredient for a healthy relationship, a mentor’s demands on a mentee, a boss’ demands on her subordinate or a husband’s demands on the wife, a parent’s demands on their children are all key ingredients to a healthy thriving relationship.
So today, I would like to encourage you to use a totally different perspective on “Demand”. Yes, every upward climb to the summit requires effort but friends, your stretch will determine your reach. See the demands that someone place on you as an opportunity for development that will require you to stretch!
Last year, I placed a demand on my team, to get really fit and challenge ourselves at the Spartan race. Most thought that this would be an impossible task, but I am grateful that my team saw this demand positively, they set-up the development plans and stretch to reach the goals. Cut the long story short, each one of us received the Spartan medal and that delight pushed the entire team to a greater desire – this time round we are going for the next leap!
“Your stretch determines your reach”
Do keep in mind though, sometimes if people find a demand to be too difficult or unachievable, they will begin to distance themselves – that is when the relationship will start to break off.
The key is to have the relationship to hold it together, watch the body signals carefully, a little hand-holding at the start may be needed to get the person into the momentum of delivering.
Friends, go for it, kick-start the virtuous cycle of demand, you will find yourself in places you could never imagine, accepting the demands others place on you with a different energy and enthusiasm, placing demands on others that will help them reach new heights!